My heart is heavy as I sit here at Panera Bread in Lakeland. I am about to travel that two hour journey to my hometown of New Port Richey, which has been delayed because I have been reading blogs all day. It struck me in the past couple of days how utterly confused I am in regards to our government. I live in America and enjoy its freedoms, so on one level I feel somewhat unjustified in the opinions that I have. Yet on another level my freedom is to have opinions and to voice them. This is the reason I am grateful to live in the country that I do. I think that one of the most important things somebody can do is to question? For how else will one know the reasons one believes what she (or he) actually believes? Now, I do have legitimate questions in regards to the nation that I live in. As I got kicked off the internet at Panera because you are only alloted one half hour to use the internet during peak hours, I thought about all the legitimate questions that I have:
Can you truly support the troops and be in opposition to the reasons that we are fighting the war?
What about the people who acquire financial gain as a result of many people dying (i.e. Halliburton, Blackwater...etc.)? Is is not morally criminal to make even a cent off of war-- off of the death of any person?
Is it America’s job, or right even, to police the world? Are we fighting someone else’s battle?
How about during the 80s and 90s when we knew that Iraq (Saddam Hussein) had used chemical weapons on Iran and the Kurdish people? Why did Rumsfeld not mention that when he spoke to Suddam back then (29 November 1993)? Why were we on Saddam’s side then and not so much now?
How do you legitimately fight a war against “terror?” When can this war end if we are not fighting a "war on terror" against a nation itself, but in a nation of people who are not all terrorists?
If we were fighting a group of people, why did we not just attack them (i.e. terrorists)?
What is the desired outcome of the war (for both the Americans and the people in Iraq)? Do we want to fight terror or do we want Iraq to be a democratic society or is it both?
What is America gaining as a result of the war?
Can we even pull out now? What would be the repercussions of doing that?
Who are we becoming indebted to (China?) as a result of the war (over $9,371,546,240,411.65 so far)? Is it possible to even get out of that much debt? Who will even pay for this debt?
Are we over there so we will not be attacked again? If so, are we any safer now (by fighting a war over there) than we were before?
What if we sent aid instead of war and attacked just the terrorists?
So there you go. Those are the questions I ask, and I encourage whoever reads this to answer to the best of there ability, with the understanding they possess at the present time. Or at the very least, how about think them through...
If you do not want to comment, you can just to e-mail me your answer at nemni01@gmail.com
It's interesting how everyone has stories. This weekend my friend had a birthday party, and it was amazing just talking to the people that are there. Lesson learned: you may be taught a thing or two when you are least expecting it. I was just on digg.com, and I saw a video. I have seen Randy Pausch's lecture before. However, I just saw him speak on Oprah. He spoke of his father, and my eyes got somewhat watery. Lesson learned: true humility is a man (in 50 years of marriage) never telling his wife he had received the Bronze Star of Valor during WWII, because it never came up.
I was reading over some of the blogs that I have on Myspace. and I came across this one (minus the hyperlinks): So today I went to Target after Chapel to get school supplies, because I tried Wal-Mart last night at about 11:00 PM and no dice. They did not have 3 prong folders. Well at Target, I walked past the entertainment and book section and picked up a book called Eat, Pray, Love I heard that it was good once so I decided to give it a try. Well, I was browsing through the CD's because I want to find some Donavon Frankenreiter stuff. (I have been looking for his CD for a while. I like to have the hard copy instead of itunes. Well, I did not find Frankenreiter. I think that you, in fact, either have to buy it online or itunes). I did find Jonny Lang though. Now let me tell you all a story about Mr. Jonny Lang. But before that let me just end my shopping trip story by saying that Target is great and I found everything I needed, did not buy the book, but got Lang's new album instead. (And I misread my schedule and missed my theology class...whoops.) But about Mr. Jonny Lang...I attended one of his concerts, I'm gonna say, about 2 1/2 years ago at a at Venoy Park in St. Petersburg. It was pretty much amazing. When the DJ of the radio station, or whoever, announced him, he told everyone in the crowd to enjoy the beer and "whatever else they may be partaking of that came form the earth." You may be asking yourself why the heck I am even mentioning this fact. Well, hold your horses because the answer is coming soon, just read on. Well, I remember seeing a whole bunch of biker guys and people who just seemed like they were there to have a good time. Well, one thing that you probably don't know about Mr. Lang is the boy can play his guitar. He plays the thing like it an extension of himself. Amazing! At one point kinda towards the middle to end of the concert it was just him on stage. He started to play a song that sounded familiar. Then I began to realize that it was a worship song. He never even sang the song. The passion that exuded from him meant more than any words could say. I can't even remember what song it was, but I will never forget that moment that night. I looked at the stars and closed my eyes and sang. Sang to my God, thinking about how incredible it is that He would use us...how incredible He was to show people his love, through a man on stage not making a sound from his mouth. Just playing the love of God for all to see. Maybe now you think that I am crazy to think that, but maybe I don't care...maybe I believe that God is bigger than words, maybe I believe that he can use a man on stage with a guitar, playing playing with the passion that is inside of him. But anyway, that was a big moment in my life.
Well, I picked up Mr. Jonny Lang's CD today,and I can't quite stop listening to a certain song that is basically wonderful. Just read the words and you will see:
"Only a Man"
I used to live my life in fear, was worried all the time From waking-up to laying down, I had no peace of mind The world became a darkened place, a struggle without end Although bitter times those were, the days that I had begun to understand, I was only a man
I grew up singing songs in church, with questions in my mind And I turned my back and ran away, from God who gave me life Then one night His presence fell, I wept and shook and then I fell down and cried "Dear Jesus rescue me again, I understand I am only a man"
And He said, "What will it be now? Will you choose Me or keep swimming upstream now? I've been inside your head hearing you scream out. Well I am just take my hand and I will take out all of the pain, and all of the fear. All of fear
I'll give you my burdens (I'll give you peace) All of my desires (I'll give you what you need) Oh, what about these chains Lord (I'll set you free) But there so heavy (Lay them at My feet) I'll lay them at your feet Just promise you won't leave (I'll never leave) So where do I go from here (Just follow Me, just follow Me) I'll follow You (just follow Me) wherever you lead Wherever You lead Wherever you lead
Fact: If you are able to listen to the song the fiddle that you hear in the song is played by none other than Sara Watkins from Nickel Creek and the woman singing is his wife Haylie.
Today I read a whole book at Barnes and Noble. It was a book of all of these random love letters. Some were touching, some were disturbing, some happy, some sad. The letters themselves were moving, but even more moving than the letters were the stories before and beyond the letters.
Let me explain: The letters and e-mails and blogs and notes were all photocopied and put into the book. Similar to the Post Secret books. There is something amazing in seeing the paper somebody used or their penmanship or the color of ink that they chose. At the end of the book there were a couple of pages of sentences, maybe a paragraph about the people who wroth the letters. And to also know what happened leading up to the letter, to read what happened after the letter was received, that is moving. To know that the man who wrote a letter with a blue pen on unlined paper with all the folds (like it had been carried in a pocket) with the small and long cursive words about how happy he was to have a son. How much he loved his wife and would alway love her. To know that this man had been killed before he got to even see his son. That's gripping. Beyond that it is crazy to know that this man's choice to write his wife a letter goes beyond him, his wife, his son, his family and friends. It affected me. What if I can affect somebody the way he has affected me? What if you can? Whether we believe it or not, we impact things in a way we will never be able to understand.
To end...I wonder if the person who buys the book will ever know that someone has already flipped every page and read through the whole thing...I wonder if I have ever bought a "new" book that somebody has already read.
Does anyone ever have those days where just one little thing seemed to make everything better? A seemingly small detail in the day that seemed to set things right. I had one one of those today. I had gotten out of New Testament Survey early today and I walked over to the patio tables outside of Bolin, and on my way over I heard a familiar melody fill my head. You see, there are speakers outside all around the campus that play instrumental music. A little background noise, if you will. Well, I soon realized that the song that was playing was none other than an instrumental version of Mr. John Mayer's song "Clarity." I couldn't help but smile as I sat at the table in between the foliage. I couldn't help but smile, and "Clarity" is not even one of the songs that come to my mind when I think of his good songs. It made me realize, once again, that there is just something about it. The only way that I can describe the effect that Mayer has on me is that his music feels like home. There is no specific time or specific place that I remember. It is just a feeling like I am home. And no matter where I am or what I am doing or what is happening in my life, as soon as I hear a John Mayer song everything seems better. Everything feels alright, even if it is only for that moment.
The picture above depicts how I feel at the moment: As I should be studying for finals and writing my paper for Old Testament I find myself being drawn to learn more about those behind our nation. There is some crazy stuff that has gone on (and is going on) right in-front of us. And the worst part about it is that there is nothing that I can do about it. Well, nothing besides writing and telling people what I have found out. But at the end of the day, this is stuff that has gone on for longer than I can comprehend. I am just learning about it now. Here is a link to a unclassified document from 1962 from George Washington University that I found earlier today. Now, I must explain that the first part was really confusing for me, at least. The real "meat and potatoes" is found on page 7 (If you download the .pdf format than it is page number 10). Crazy stuff...what makes us think that now is any different? How do you win against and idea (see blog from December 10, 2007)? Well, nothing can be better for me at the moment than listening to David Gilmore and David Bowie on the PBS special that I am watching. Words seem to escape me at the moment. So have a good one. Ugh....nothing is better to soothe the soul....MUSIC!
02 December 2007
Events of Saturday 1 December 2007:
1. Woke up an hour later than expected 2. Got ready and spent 4 hours working on the Theater project 3. Came home ate the fastest I have ever eaten (my leftovers from the previous evening) 4. Went to Charliepalozza (for free) and saw Josh Gracin 5. Sweet talked the lady into letting us reenter after we had to leave because Nikki had worship practice at 7:00PM 6. Got back at 9:00 and saw Mark Chesnutt and the wonderful Charlie Daniels Band
Charlie Daneils is an amazing person. For 17 years he has been doing Charliepalozza for his charity called The Angelus. He just seems like he is an incredible person. I want to meet him one day and tell him that. And His music is amazing! Well I must go... Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid is calling my name.
